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Monday, 24 March 2025

The Inmate, Episode One.

March 18thUp in the mornin' and out to school”, so sang Chuck Berry. For us it was up in the middle of the night and drive to Haikou. We arrived at the hospital about half past seven, lucky for us, much later and we would have found it difficult to get into the car park. We were early so that we could visit the local greasy spoon.

Here are our two breakfasts, just the usual really.

From there we went to see Doctor Zhang who very kindly prescribed another two months’ worth of female hormones to save us a trip in the near future, or so we thought. From there we went to the inpatient registration, paid our deposit of ¥2,000.00 and then headed to the oncology ward where I would be staying. First, we went through the usual procedures, here I am being very helpful in pointing out that the scale is not correctly ‘zeroed’!

Once everything was sorted, we had a chat with the oncologist, 梁医生, Doctor Liáng. Huan was keen to know how much it was going to cost us, to make sure that we were well prepared. The price was within what we had budgeted but the time was not. Here was me thinking it would be two or three weeks, a month maximum. It seems I will be here for two months! At least we have a nice room, with a view too. We can keep an eye on Donald.


We had to go out at lunch time, to buy toilet paper and a toothbrush cup. On the way home we stopped for lunch where I was grilled by the waitress about my nationality, again.

Lunch was OK, no rice for me.

And then it was time for me to relax a bit. Now now, no nagging please!

Sat there I was looking at a Honda Fit, it looked rather odd. I think they had lowered the suspension. Even more interesting was the sticker in the back quarter light and the one under the passenger side wing mirror. Anybody know why?

Back at the hospital and after we had both had a nap it was time for some sartorial elegance. You have to wear the provided clothes when you go for tests as an inpatient.

First, I had to be prepared! The dressing gown is because it is cold outside!

I was going to be shoved into a Siemens 3T type Magnetom, hence the liquid being injected into my veins. She was fining it difficult to find them, I told her that they were hiding from the cold! Huan managed to sneak a photo from the doorway.

I seemed to spend ages in that machine and it was noisy. When they let me out, I told them that I felt like dancing. Huan caught that too!

Another ECG was next, despite me having had one last month. I guess the doctors have to be sure before they start no matter what has gone before.

That was our lot for today so headed back to our temporary home. We are on the fourth floor, look who is in the same building, three floors above us.

All done we decided to ‘order in’ our dinner this evening, it was terrible and will be a last resort from now on. No photos of the dinner are there but here is the expedition leader enjoying her new ‘camp bed’. We did the calculations and it is cheaper for her to stay here with me than to go to a cheapo hotel by herself. It makes out lives a little easier too.

March 19th “Wakey wakey! Rise and shine!” Or in my case, wakey wakey rise and bleed At least I didn’t have to go anywhere else in my pyjamas.

This is my bedside table for the next two months, Huan hasn’t got one. Note all the books. I have read them before but planning for a month I thought I would bring this lot. Of course, the top is shared with all the tablets I have to take!

Breakfast for both of us was a simple one today, a couple of buns for Huan and a sandwich for me. We ate them looking over a scenic view behind the hospital.


Back in the ward after breakfast the doctor came to tell me what we would be doing today. This morning would start with me having a mould made of my front torso. It would be in here.

Here Dr. Liáng is first trying to get me into the correct position and then, after realising that I am an odd shape and have very long legs, asking me to turn the other way.

Next was the mould preparation, it took three of them to do that bit.

Then they put me and the machine in alignment.

The final result? Something that bears a vague resemblance to my front torso. We’ll find out this afternoon if it is good enough.

Lunch time I sent Huan off to buy a take away, she was wearing the floor out in the ward and I was busy with today’s photos and this post. I should have gone with her, she brought me back two of the things I do not really like eating, tofu and sweet potato leaves.

After lunch, and after Huan had finished her nap, it was time for me to empty my bladder, refill it with another bottle of water and present myself back at the Simulation Room.

I was there to collect my mould which I then had to carry to the next building. There they would ‘pair me with the machine’ and calibrate for compatibility.

First though, a shock to the system, another needle was required to pump me full of some strange liquid again. Why do I hate them so? Don’t worry, I already know the answer.

Then it was onwards to yet another machine, presumably the one that will be carrying out the deadly deed. It looks all big and shiny, not at all scary.

Soon I was loaded into the machine and then pushed, pulled, prodded and written on.

“Where is the picture of you in your undies with scribbles on your body?” I hear you ask. I wanted to spare your blushes so here’s a question for you instead. What is this?

Did you get it right? It is a cradle for your mobile that provides shade so that you can see the screen when you are driving your bike or scooter.

Once everything was finished, we went shopping again. We needed a mosquito killing plug-in, they bothered Huan a lot last night. We also bought some salad, some olive leaf and some Xinjiang bread to go with all the meat Huan had bought at lunch time. On the way there we thought you might like a little scenery for today.

Finally, back home I thought I would show you my fancy all singing, all dancing nameplate.

March 20th On the doctor’s rounds this morning we found out that we had a free day. They are still planning my treatment, whatever that means. So, instead of hospital photos, today you have tourist photos. We went to Baishamen Park, not too far to walk.

The sky was blue but there was still a chill from the north wind. When we arrived at the park the first subject we found was snowbirds dancing.

At the entrance we used Huan’s phone to take a selfie, successfully missing this sign!


Then it was time to head down the tourist trail.

We fancied having our photos taken here, together, two monkeys on their thrones. However, we could not find anyone to do us the honours and this was not a selfie capable shot.

There were rather a lot of school children around today so found some with their Granddad and asked him why they weren’t at school. It seems that the school had organised a day trip for them, lucky kids, I don’t remember any trips like that.


More snowbirds for you, in fact we have never seen this place so full.

At the beach entrance we found more snowbirds and had the usual nationality discussion.

From there we took a view back towards the big wheel and one towards the beach entrance.


Nobody was swimming but we thought you would still like to see the beach. Sorry about the alien intruder in the third picture!



At the other end of the beach, we found this, the entrance to a night market. We couldn’t decide if it was being constructed or dismantled. One evening we’ll return to check.

In all the ‘lawned’ areas of the park we had seen all kinds of installations. This is the last one we saw. They are all part of a forthcoming Haikou DS Jungle Race, an event for children. It is held throughout China and looks to be pretty amazing.

Let us now bore you with just a few scenery pictures, it is a nice place.





Huan was just beginning to feel disappointed that we had not found birds yet, at least any that we could get near. This one popped out of the hedge, heard the camera shutter of the first unsuccessful photo thus allowing me to take these two before he popped back into the hedge.


This guy was having trouble finding birds too!

We never really remember our way around this park, our visits are too infrequent. We do remember things when we see them of course, such as these stepping stones.


Around and around we went and so did the big wheel.

These two photos took ages to get, the birds are adept at hiding behind leaves.


Beginning our homeward trek along the main tourist lane we bumped into someone who knew me. This is Nikki from Explore Hainan, an amazing lady. As well as being an artist herself, she is also a font of local ethnic knowledge. She is also fluent in Chinese so whether you are an English speaker or a Chinese one she can help you. Behind us in this photo is her shop, paintings by local artists, Li and Liao crafts, Nikki’s own stuff, well worth a visit.

Almost out of the park and another bird for the boss.

Her morning was brightened up even more by finding a lizard on the main road home.

Lunch was street food, the left bowl for Huan, the right one for me and the bag of cooked liver also for me. It was a little spicy so we followed it with ice cream.


After a nap and uploading all the photos it was time to go out for a rather late dinner. First, we found three ladies who desperately need to visit the hairdressers.

During our walk we found where Carrefour used to be. It is now another large chain, better than Carrefour in all aspects bar the foreign goods section. There are other places on this little island that cover those needs though. We won’t bother with photos of our dinner today, instead we will finish with me and what Huan said is an apt bear.

March 21st Huan brought breakfast in this morning. We don’t get woken up by nurses as before, because there is no need so we are sometimes a bit late waking up. I started on this post, too many photos yesterday. After breakfast Dr. Liáng appeared to tell us that we may start at noon today, they are not quite sure yet. I carried on working on this post.

Around ten Dr. Liáng appeared again and let me know what the procedure would be. The first dose would be today. There would be thirty-three in total, one a day from Monday to Friday with weekends off. He explained what I needed to do, explained the possible side effects and then got me to sign the relevant paperwork. Hopefully needles will not be required!

A few minutes before twelve I presented myself downstairs to be fed into the machine. It has a great name, “Halcyon”. However, unlike the legend I will have thirty-two more halcyon days and not just fourteen. Once I was ‘loaded into its insides’ and left alone by the doctors it was all a bit of an anticlimax. All the machines up till now have been very noisy, this one wasn’t. Once I was released from its clutches, and given my instructions for the rest of the procedure we went back to the ward to change before going across the road for some takeaway lunch. We took it back to the ward with us and then had a nap. Well, Huan had a nap, I carried on with Ian Rankin and John Rebus in The Falls.

We were out earlier today, and the Carrefour replacement was our destination, Huan wanted some ready cooked food to bring ‘home’. The first photo here is an old one, from a noticeboard half way round. It shows the view from the hospital side a few years ago. The second one, while not quite at the same angle, shows how much things have improved in the intervening years.


The walkway is very nice with some small piers, presumably for fishing.

We were quite lucky with the birds today.



We walked a little further along the branch of the waterway we were on, knowing we would still end up in the right place. It looks wonderful, the second photo is part of the reason why.


We even managed to find a squirrel scurrying about the ceiling of a flower shop. It was quite difficult to capture, I took many photos, but this one seems to be OK.

Huan, acting as the director, made sure we found more birds before we even arrived at our destination. Distance was against me again.


Food in hand, and some disposable bowls, we begun our trek home. Thankfully the sun was on its way down so the chances of SWMBO finding more birds was very slim.

On one part of our journey we fancied taking the upper path, near the buildings. It had a little shade and some interesting buildings. Why is nobody using this one?


Soon ‘home’ was very near.

We had to take a short diversion at the hospital in order to get back down to the walkway. That diversion included this wonderful warning sign.

Back in our five-star bedroom we got our dinner ready, Huan’s is the chicken and mine is the chicken hearts. The bread is for Huan too, the vegetables are to be chopped up with my trusty Russian army pocket knife and then shared between us.

All my efforts at trying to finish earlier failed, by the time today’s part of this post was done it was after half past eight.

March 22nd Good morning all! Huan was missing her cuddles and asked if she could join me last night. These beds are too small for that and neither of us would have slept well but we did pose for a picture in my bed.

After lunch we decided to walk a different way, towards Xinbu island. We had no intention of crossing the bridge today, we thought it would be too far. Those little birds hiding under the bushes were still around.

Passing by a Lotus EV, I forgot the name, we met a couple of Pakistani students. We forgot to ask where they were studying but here we are, all together. You can tell that they are more used to selfies than we are!

Soon Xinbu island was in view and we strolled along the walkways.


More birds were found by my illustrious leader, almost too small to take photos of.

No need to ask who chose this one!

And unusually, I found these two before Huan did.


It is nice to walk by the sea, I love the sights and the sounds. In fact I could quite easily live on this little island. Anyone fancy sending me suitcases full of dosh?


Eventually we had to leave our little path due to sea wall construction so we took the road to the south of Baishamen Park.


This is one that I just had to share. Note the roof mounted lamps and the insinuation that this car is an off-road wonder. It isn’t of course; it is a short range mini EV. Can you see the spelling mistakes? Having said that I quite like it although I would never fit in it.

And then it was Huan’s turn again, this time not only finding birds but a lizard too.



Before too long we saw the welcoming site of part of the hospital in the distance.

Dinner was just before we reached there, a little restaurant around the corner. Huan’s is the fish, mine is the pork and the vegetables are to share. Not exactly what you would call gourmet food but it was good enough for us.

By the time we got ‘home’ we were both exhausted, we had walked over ten kilometres due to a wrong turning on the way home. Yes, it was my error! I don’t think we will tell the doctors.

March 23rd Huan went out to buy breakfast, pork bread for her and baozi for me and a boiled egg each. She came back happy because she found and successfully snapped a lizard.

After finishing yesterday’s post, eating lunch and having a nap we decided to take Donald for a drive. Can’t have his battery dying now can we? Our destination was the far reaches of Xinbu Island, the one adjacent to where we are. Goats were everywhere. For some reason some of them were rubbing their bodies against the little brick wall.

Huan found a few small shrines.

As for me, I was more interested in the sea and the fishing boats.



From a distance we had thought this was an enormous old Chinese junk. Getting closer we realised it was a group of shipwrecks, made of metal and not wood.

Here is Huan stood by the side of one, close up and distant.


You can see that the first collage is a couple of bulbous noses but can you tell what the second photo is? I took this while I was explaining to Huan what it was like to walk underneath the cargo holds of bulk carriers to service the gas detection systems, something that I did in one of my previous careers.


Having had Huan, near and far, we tried to do the same with me.

Let’s finish off the boatyard with my favourite, the ‘houseboat’ or at least that is what I like to think it is and then the whole group together.


More life, the only dogs we saw in this village were in this little yard and they were very happy to see ‘hoomans’. The second one was going to rush back to his home and preach about ‘the eyeballs in the sky’! If you don’t know, Google it, you may enjoy.


Walking back to where we left Donald, we took a last look at the sea for today.


Huan tried a bird with her phone. She is getting better.

She never fails to get me though! Here I am explaining to the fisherman and his wife that I would love to live in a house by the sea, like the one I am pointing to. He is explaining to us that there are no title deeds, hence no compensation should the government need the land. He also asked why we didn’t visit early in the morning when the village would be full of people buying the freshly caught fish. It might be interesting to see although I don’t know where they would park their cars and market trucks.

Not wanting to be too early back to the hospital, to ensure the car park had many spaces, we drove back on to Haidian Island and then all the around the northern side until we reached the HCC building. Normally we only ever see Corner’s Deli so today we had a good walk around. We’ll make sure we di it again sometime over the next few weeks so that we can share lots more photos with you. For today, it’s just our dinner.

Back ‘home’ we went, where Huan watched TV and I waded through over a hundred photos again. It’s a good job we are using digital cameras these days or I would need to take a mortgage out to pay for all the film. Once all the pics were sorted, edited deleted etc there was again no time for updating the blog. I thought I would watch a movie but even better, my children called me on a group call. Happiness reigned supreme! The movie could wait.

March 24th Huan went off for breakfast, I skipped it this morning. I felt like my belly is expanding over the last few days, not good for the silicon clamp they put on me before feeding me to the machine. Instead, I took a shower, trying to avoid the black marker guidelines on my body and had a shave. The doctor came around to fill me in, I have to have a needle today, to ‘protect my bones’. I found out that they are also irradiating my lymph nodes in my groin. In my scan a month ago there were no traces of cancer there so maybe this is just precautionary. I also learned that there may be another side effect, a feeling of nausea and possible vomiting, during the treatment.

Once the doctor had left it was time to update this post with yesterday’s info. I really must try and keep the photos down this week. Mind you, that should be easier as I will have a treatment every day until the weekend arrives again.

The nurse arrived and Huan went crazy again.



Sandwiches for lunch for both of us, followed by a nap for Huan, “McDonald & Dodds” for me, before going downstairs for the next dose. Being early and taking advantage of the lovely weather, I sat on the wall in the sun.

After my very short treatment, just a few minutes, we went out for a walk. More coffee sachets were needed and of course we had to eat. Walking around the hospital grounds we found a new shop and canteen, no good for us today but definitely in the future.

Shopping finished it was time for dinner. We stopped at a small restaurant on the main street where the proprietor and his wife were extremely helpful. We both fancied Ròu jiā mó but also wanted non spicy vegetables with it. The results were good enough for us.


And that was it, back to the hospital. You can expect less photos in the coming weeks, especially from Monday to Friday. I may have to limit my walks as well; we’ll check with Dr. Liáng in the morning. Stay tuned for more from the “Only When I Laugh” studios here in Hainan Haikou People’s Hospital. Bye for now!

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